Say what is going on without blame.
Direct answer
Nonviolent Communication has four parts: describe what you observe without judgement, say how you feel, state the need behind the feeling and make a clear request. It helps reduce blame and defensiveness.
Example
"When the report arrives after the deadline (observation), I feel anxious (feeling), because I need to review it before the client call (need). Could you send it by Wednesday noon? (request)"
Tips
- Separate facts from interpretations.
- Name feelings, not accusations.
- Make requests, not demands.
- Listen for the other person's needs.
Where Teyro fits
Teyro's How to Manage Conflict at Work course turns this into short lessons you can play in a few minutes a day. It has 50 lessons, and you can start free.
The bottom line
Be honest and kind at the same time.
